The spark will return back into my eyes instead of seeing constant dead.

It's freaky I had plenty of spark when I was a kid, but now it's gone.

That quote from that woman on Quora that she told me just sticks out everyday.

"There's no life in there, no spark."

Maybe one day it'll come back.

One day.

Maybe.

My mother came to Hazard when I was just seven
Even then the folks in town said with prejudiced eyes, "That boy's not right"
Three years ago when I came to know Mary
First time that someone looked beyond the rumors and the lies
And saw the man inside
We used to walk down by the river
She loved to watch the sun go down
We used to walk along the river
And dream our way out of this town
No one understood what I felt for Mary
No one cared until the night she went out walking all alone
And never came home
Man with a badge came knocking next morning
Here was I surrounded by a thousand fingers suddenly
Pointed right at me
I swear I left her by the river
I swear I left her safe and sound
I need to make it to the river
And leave this old Nebraska town
I think about my life gone by
How it's done me wrong
There's no escape for me this time
All of my rescues are gone, long gone
I swear I left her by the river
I swear I left her safe and sound
Oh, I need to make it to the river
And leave this old Nebraska town
Ooh-ooh-ooh

Smaller chested women are very lucky their boobs aren't called hangars, utters, large, or big.

Just boobs.

Very lucky.

"How cruel it is that I see beauty in everyone but never in myself.

I as though my face were only etched violently upon my skin. and each time i glance in the mirror, i always see a face that feels too foreign to my own. An image of a stranger that seems to be carrying all the self-made burden on its body."

When people on here try to tell you how to run your profile. Had a guy tell me he don't like my profile picture. I found it strange too that a little bit before, support messaged me that I should take down my profile picture.

I had video game characters before as my profile picture, so why is it a problem now?

It's of my female V from Cyberpunk 2077, she's not real. I even sent another picture of my V proving she isn't real.

I had Dutch van der Linde as my profile picture on here, but that one wasn't a problem? That one looked realistic.

A quick Google search shows Dutch is from Red Dead Redemption 2.

So not a real person.

When someone who doesn't even know you can just tell everything about you through your eyes.

I remember in Walmart a couple years ago, was waiting for my sister to get done with her taxes. An older gentleman worker comes up to me and asks if I'm okay. I told him I was as you never want to burden some stranger, but he didn't buy it due to his tone of okay.

On another website where you answer questions, I had two women look at my profile and my pictures.

One said, "what got me were your eyes, there's no life in there, no spark."

Another had said she could see distrust, hatred, and sadness.

One guy said I had the most obvious dull and lifeless eyes.

"Outside of the dull and lifeless eyes that may be visible when one can't even muster the energy to try to be happy (or fake it).. well... (you can plenty of examples in the images posted below. Including ones where the person is smiling but the eyes are not. ..

Angel has the most obvious one when it comes to the look I mean - focus on the eyes and not the rest of the face and you might be able to see it..)"

I'm always so amazed that while everything can be masked, the eyes cannot.

Reminds me of a quote I found yesterday: "Because your eyes are always honest they will always be telling the truth, even if your mouth is telling a lie."

My gears.

When people tell you how you should operate on here.

Message today: "Hey like your style i bet you have a great smile.your serious face doesnt suit you x"

1) When you look like I do with saggy pancake boobs, short, and a bit chubby with stretch marks from having lost weight, there's nothing to be proud of.

2) I look weird as Hell smiling.

3) I don't like fake smiling. True smile is reserved for my dogs, my best friends, my Dad, and my sister.

Chatroom: "Why come in nude chat if you're not horny?"

1) Dude, nowhere on NN does it say you must talk about sex and whatnot. I've seen people talk about pets, hockey, remodeling a kitchen, weather, bad luck in life, etc. in the main chat. Get on them too, not just me.

In the past: "Why does she turn off statuses?"

1) Even when I did had comments on, I never looked. So keeping people from wasting their breath on something I will never see.

Y'all pay me?

No.

Y'all my boss?

No.

My profile, my facial expressions, my choice. NN isn't a movie set where you think it's okay to direct me on how I should speak in the chatroom or look in my pictures.

Even premium has a block limit.

Attempted to block more people, cut off is 200 people compared to non-premium which is three.

Learn something everyday.

If you think you aren’t loved, just remember that there’s hundreds of millions of white blood cells willing to fight and die to keep you safe every day. Respect 🫡

Why don't you let me be
Leave me alone
You start a fire inside that I could never control
You want to see a reaction
Come on and cut me down
You've gone as far as I'll go
Now you're crossing the line
And I am letting you know
Well here's your reaction
Stand up
I have had enough
Walk away before I finish what you started
Face to face, I will push you in your place
End this game before I finish what you started
Face to face, everything will change
You planted the seed
How my anger has grown
Got a feeling inside that I can't seem to control
You want to see a reaction
Come on and cut me down
You've gone as far as I'll go
Now you're crossing the line
And I am letting you know
Well here's your reaction
Stand up
I have had enough
Walk away before I finish what you started
Face to face, I will push you in your place
End this game before I finish what you started
Face to face, everything will change
Insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
After insult
Stand up
I have had enough
Walk away before I finish what you started
Face to face I will put you in your place
End this game before I finish what you started
Face to face everything will change
Walk away
Everything will change
End this game
You want to see a reaction
You want to see a reaction
Stand up